iamGUCCI

was reading jolene's blog when i saw her wrote this:

even is just for that few mins, that few msgs.
im happy enough.
i know it means nothing to you.
but im thankful enough for all this.
and also it always remind me about the past.
whenever i receive your msg.
there's nothing i can think about.
but waiting for your next msg.
and is that word. "wait"
and how happy i would be whenever i receive.
and will there be asking, am i dreaming?
it seems like it went to the very start again. haas.

okie. i know i should read less of her bloody emo blog.
but sometimes, that's the oni way to know how she's doing.
=)
though she's writing abt herself. but somehow, just felt like this today.

he sms me today. finally he took the initiative.
of cuz, i was quite surprised that he actually did that, cuz since tat day, he didnt reali tok to me much. and i can sense that he's getting irritated by me.
so i choose to run away from reality as usual.
or maybe. both are running away.
didnt want to have high hopes in it.
cuz the higher it is, the deeper i'll fall. and i'll take a long long time to get over it.
though it's only a few sms from him, but that's oledi enough.
i dun hope for alot but at least to him, i'm still a fren of his. =D

was toking to wei jun last nite. a surprise call from her.
i told myself, i wont cry anymore. but at that moment, i cried again.
though it's oni for a short while, but ENOUGH is ENOUGH.
and she reminded me of the classic phrase that i once told her again and again.
now it seems like, i've to say it to myself. =)

to say the truth, i dread coming back to singapore last nite.
i was afraid that things will remain the same or even get worse.
i was afraid to face the reality. cuz i really dun wan to face it anymore.
but the moment i tok to her, i realized running away doesnt solve anything.
and if no effort's given in, wadever u wished for will never come true.
ya. it might seems as though i still want it back BADLY.
but den again, this involve 2 people.
no matter how badly i want it, so long as the other party strongly disapprove everything, there's no way i can do anything abt it.

mongling said she can see that i'm happier today.
maybe it seems to be.
cuz i choose not to think abt it. like i've said. i choose not to face it.
i choose to run away. running away from reality may seems stupid.
but at times, it's of good use. especially when u cant do anything to it at all.













as long as....